So as we approach the summer season of 2009...my 28th summer season in life...I find myself in an unusual situation. Muffin top. Sigh. Fuck a 6 pack..I'm working with something more like a Keg here. Just big and round and full of delicious things.
I've only been this size once before. It was when I was around 19ish. I called it the freshman 38. Except the weight all got put on around my senior year of High School when my then "love of my life omg I will die without him" faux-boyfriend shipped off to the marines and left behind a sad shell of a woman.
(Ps amazing how 10 years later and I still have a faux-boyfriend. You'd think by now I'd have figured out how to get a real one lol. But as usual, I digress.)
So after many years of being poor and broke in NYC living off of Ramen noodles and Bodega turkey sammiches, I lost the weight and was feeling pretty good about finally being able to walk into a club without sucking in my gut. It's amazing how little your body really needs to survive lol. In retrospect, if it wasn't for all the dates and old men buying drinks for us, I'm not sure me and my then roommate would have ever eaten lol. God bless a doggy bag. Good looking out Emily. :)
But now we're back to the good ole days of wearing all black like the Omen. The beautiful thing about this summer season is the fabulous accessories.
Huge wide belts...fabulous printed scarves....gut crushing black tights. Just some really amazing fashion out there to help me breathe better...literally.
And don't sleep on all the peasant type looks. While you can't wear them out to the club (although many sad misdirected girls do) they are good for those "weekend lunches" with the ladies. Pigging out on mojitos and fried calamari, without having to follow it up with a pack of laxatives and a three day hunger strike.
So God Bless you 2009 for providing me with the proper accessories to continue to party like a rock star. Without actually having to go work out.
Tye-Dye Scarf 8.80 @ www.forever21.com
Wide Belt on sale 19.50@ www.ardenb.com
I've only been this size once before. It was when I was around 19ish. I called it the freshman 38. Except the weight all got put on around my senior year of High School when my then "love of my life omg I will die without him" faux-boyfriend shipped off to the marines and left behind a sad shell of a woman.
(Ps amazing how 10 years later and I still have a faux-boyfriend. You'd think by now I'd have figured out how to get a real one lol. But as usual, I digress.)
So after many years of being poor and broke in NYC living off of Ramen noodles and Bodega turkey sammiches, I lost the weight and was feeling pretty good about finally being able to walk into a club without sucking in my gut. It's amazing how little your body really needs to survive lol. In retrospect, if it wasn't for all the dates and old men buying drinks for us, I'm not sure me and my then roommate would have ever eaten lol. God bless a doggy bag. Good looking out Emily. :)
But now we're back to the good ole days of wearing all black like the Omen. The beautiful thing about this summer season is the fabulous accessories.
Huge wide belts...fabulous printed scarves....gut crushing black tights. Just some really amazing fashion out there to help me breathe better...literally.
And don't sleep on all the peasant type looks. While you can't wear them out to the club (although many sad misdirected girls do) they are good for those "weekend lunches" with the ladies. Pigging out on mojitos and fried calamari, without having to follow it up with a pack of laxatives and a three day hunger strike.
So God Bless you 2009 for providing me with the proper accessories to continue to party like a rock star. Without actually having to go work out.
Tye-Dye Scarf 8.80 @ www.forever21.com
Wide Belt on sale 19.50@ www.ardenb.com
Comments
Post a Comment