::Hands down, I'm too proud for love."::

So you've done it. You've successfully made it out the Hoe Zone. Perhaps you didn't hold out the 6 months you'd aimed for. But you crossed major milestones.
You speak everyday. You've introduced the friends. Had countless dates, many of them lasting 2 or 3 days. He's farted. You've snored. He's pointed out your boogers. You've picked lint out his hair. He's seen you without makeup, heels, fancy labels or anything else you hide behind. You've shown yourself. Naked. Literally and figuratively.
You're totally smitten. And you give it up.
"Now, me non-clairvoyant and in love...made the coochie easy and the obvious invisible..." -J.Scott

You my dear, have cleared the "jump-off", "hoe" and "side-chick" zones, and you are entering the scariest and most complicated zone there is. The quicksand of zones. You are entering the "Where do we go from here" zone.
This is where even the most masterful gamer gets lost.
This is where none of those rules you scribbled down while watching "Tough Love" in your Snuggie and wife beater matter anymore.
This is where Patty and her damn Millionaries could tell you all day what to do next. And you will ignore it. And follow your heart. Your foolish, broken, half-demented heart.

See in this zone, you are both falling. But neither one can admit it first.
Because then that person looses. You could be stuck in this zone for years. There are only two ways out. Either you move up to the "official" zone. Or you get downgraded to "friend with benefits" zone. Or you are just done. Totally. Its a scary fate.

Half the day is spent holding yourself back. You compose a million sensitive ass text messages in your heard that you never send. For fear that too much "love" will turn them off.
You make plans with other friends, just to be able to keep your distance. Even though the whole time you're at the bar sipping that martini, all you want to do is go home and call him and eat ice cream and dream about that little place on his neck.

You dont want him to date anyone else. But you can't actually say that. You don't want him to feel "trapped" and revolt. You dont want to make any sudden movements that will scare him away, to never return.

You want this to be 5th grade. Where you get passed a note in the middle of Social Studies and it says "will you be my girlfriend. Circle one. Yes or No."
And you think, and draw your circle, and the rest is history.

You want this to be the animal kingdom. Where you pick someone to mate with, and then fiercely fight for the rest of your life to feed them, keep them safe, and shut down every other lionesses attempt to fu#k your king.

But this is not a bad episode of The Wonder Years, or a Disney animated film.
This is real life. With real hearts. And real hurts.

I dont know how to get out of this zone. This blog is actually seeking advice.
I sit here with our black and white photobooth laughs, ticket stubs, all this evidence of memories and love being built.
And i dont know how to keep it.

Dear Blog Readers and Insiders:
How do you get out of the "where do we go from here zone."
Without doing too much to scare him away, or not doing enough and risk loosing him to another.

Caring is Creepy.