Basically my life right now: 5 am: Alarm goes off to get my fat ass to the gym. 5:10 am: Snooze. 5:30 am: snooze. 5:40 am: Thinks I snooze, actually turns off alarm 6:45 am: FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK. *hastily throws on some semi-clean clothing and rushes out the door* 7 am: Begins commute to NYC for work. Listens to depressing news radio about how Donald Trump could actually be president. Makes mental note to never stay at one of his hotels. Unless, obviously, I find a dope Groupon. 9 am - 5 pm: Works tirelessly and never checks cell phone, or social media, or takes too many personal breaks to wander aimlessly around the city. (sarcasm obviously. I do work hard as shit though. I"m just slightly a.d.d.)) 6 pm: Contemplates the amazing work out I'm going to have. Plans out outfit. 7 pm: Passes liquor store on the way home. 10 pm: After 2 hours of binge watching Netflix original programming, finds self in front of fridge wearing a hoodie and socks eating gouda and drinking ...
You didn't think death would stop me from talking your ear off did you?