Dear Joe...

I lost my virginity my senior year of high school. In my mind, it was to my cute little quarterback boyfriend after prom. It was awkward and sweet and funny and we went on to go to college together and get married and have kids. In my mind. In reality I was about 180lbs, had probably 4 actual friends and a newly found obsession with the internet. I never went to my prom. I didn’t have a boyfriend. I didn’t get married or go to college. I guess, this is where it all began. Not to say I was a loser all of my high school career. I was pretty popular up until junior year. And then it just came all crashing down. Depression. Weight gain. Puberty hit me hard. I suppose in retrospect I was always very pretty. But there were two things I wasn’t. White and skinny. And those were the only two things I ever wanted to be. So in a sense, I spent most of my senior year hating myself, just for being myself. Twisted. It wasn’t just being white and skinny. It was the whole lifestyle that went with it...